Viktor: Hello and thank you so much for sharing your story! I briefly mentioned interviews with the couples in one announcement and users expressed a lot of interest (which I can understand, I am extremely curious myself). Let’s start with a couple words about you.
Taylor: My name is Taylor. I am a 22 year old nursing student that is graduating within the next few months.I live in the Midwest part of the United States. I dated one guy very seriously throughout high school and when we broke up, I decided I wanted to be single for sometime. I tried dating a few years after the break up , but found most people my age were very immature and did not know how to handle responsibilities. I was looking for a long-term relationship and did not want to waste my time on a short term thing.
I found FIRE about a year ago and it immediately spoke to me. I decided very early on that this was the route for me. It was always a concern about getting my future significant other on board with this concept especially considering my age.
Viktor: Oh, that resonates with me so much. Aligning financial plans with someone always felt so hard to me. How did you find out about firedating.me?
Taylor: I am a part of ChooseFI facebook group and an individual posted about this site.
Viktor: Happy to hear that people spread the word! I am so grateful to “the individual”! So what was your first impression of the site?
Taylor: I have never used a dating site so I do not have much to compare to. It was relatively easy to use though. The first two days of using it, I was finding individuals who were very far for me or there was a huge age gap.
Viktor: And did you actually expect to meet someone through the site?
Taylor: I did not think I was going to find someone on this app. Part of me doesn't even know why I signed up to begin with. I did know I was sick of wasting my time and wanted someone with the same beliefs and values. Financials have always been a huge part of my life so I thought there would be no harm in trying.
Viktor: I am glad that in the end you decided to sign up and it worked out so well for you. How many people have you chatted with before meeting Cody?
Taylor: I chatted very briefly with five individuals.
Viktor: Do you remember Cody’s profile? What did you think when you saw it for the first time?
Taylor: Yes, I remember coming across Cody’s profile. I thought he was very attractive. I read about him and saw that we had similar hobbies such as lifting. He also just graduated college so we were in the same stages of life.
Viktor: It is amazing that you even have similar hobbies (in addition to being into FIRE). Who sent the request?
Taylor: I did.
Viktor: How did everything develop further?
Taylor: Cody messaged me and asked me about my nursing career and why I chose it. We chatted for about 2 weeks on the site and then added each other on Facebook so we could message more often.
Viktor: How and when did you start feeling your connection?
Taylor: We began facetiming about every three days for hours. We would message all day, and then when I was off of school and he was done with work, we would hop on a Facetime call! We started to discuss big topics such as marriage, political views, kids, moral beliefs, etc. We agreed on almost all of these topics. I realized that he was special to me when I would look forward to our Facetime calls every evening.
Viktor: Wow, having video calls every evening sounds sweet! Did you start with a long distance relationship first?
Taylor: Yes, he is actually in the States right now. He is from Canada and has a work from home opportunity since COVID hit. So he has been staying with me for the past month and plans to for the next three months.
Viktor: Staying together?
Taylor: Yes, we have met and Cody has been living with me at my apartment for the past month. We are living very frugally in a studio apartment. It is going even better than expected. Him coming to stay with me for a few months was something I did not take lightly. It was a very big commitment for both of us. It is going extremely well and we are planning the future around the two of us being together.
Viktor: I can definitely understand the importance of living together. Also I am super happy to hear that you are both frugal and it works well! I definitely remember times when my own frugality was perceived as a problem. What do you plan next?
Taylor: In a couple of months, he is going to be moving back to Canada and we will have a long distance relationship for a year. I will start my nursing career in a few months here and he will continue to grow in his career. After a year, I am planning on moving to Montana and will only be four hours away from him at that point. In three years, our goal is to start my travel nursing career and he will get a job that lets him work remotely. We are looking for job opportunities that will excel our FIRE journey.
Viktor: You already have plans for 3 years in the future! Impressive! I am so happy to see how you are going through your FIRE journey together! Thank you for reaching out to me! Could you tell the readers about your motivation?
Taylor: I reached out because I was surprised at how well this relationship is going. It is so great to have access to a site with like minded individuals. Being involved in FIRE is very unique and to find like minded individuals is such a relief. I discovered that if you are involved in FIRE, you most likely will have the same belief system and things will just roll smoothly.
Viktor: I can’t agree more! FIRE is such a strong belief, being aligned at least on this dimension plays a huge role (saying from my own past relationship where we were not aligned). What would you advise other firedating.me users who are to meet their FIRE partner?
Taylor: Do not try to be someone you’re not. Cody and I were very upfront about our beliefs and viewpoints about financials, marriage, kids, life, etc. IF you are not being sincere with a possible significant other, it is only going to lead to mayhem later on.
Since we are long distance, we prioritize communication. I learned so much about Cody through Facetime and our conversations so that when we actually met, it was not weird at all. It flowed very naturally. We also listen to relationship podcasts and talk about them. This has helped our relationship immensely. Communication is so important. We also dream together. I think dreaming is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. Being a part of fire, we are obviously very goal oriented. We made financial plans and goals together. We have painted a very clear image of what we want our life to look like and that helps make the distance be less of a stressor.
Viktor: Could you please share a couple pointers for relationship podcasts?
Taylor: Yes! So we primarily listen to three podcasts: ChooseFI, One Extraordinary Marriage, Bigger Pockets. We each listen to the podcast separately, write down key details we would like to talk about, then discuss it over dinner or facetime. By doing this, you find out so much about your partner. Their thought process, views, and ways of handling adversity if it arises. We have found that after discussing different podcasts, it always leads to something new and exciting to talk about. Doing this increases communication to another level.
Viktor: Thank you for the pointers! It was lovely talking to you. We wish you both plenty of amazing time together and to eventually close the distance!
I hope you enjoyed the interview as much as I did. If you are a couple, who met on firedating.me, please reach out to me.